Friday, December 12, 2008

Come Hither...And Let Me Supersize You

McGothika

Two goth-beast tatties (that's me and you)
Special sauce (no need to explain)
Let us please
Tickles, Fun times
As you spank on my buns

I'm lovin' it!

High-Flying Heartthrob

Rutherford
I fly through the air with the greatest of ease!
SWM seeks Gal with strong heart for
high-flying fun! I aim to break the World Record for
the longest kiss while in a tandem skydive, and
am in need of a lady to help me make that
dream a reality! If you are pregnant, suffer from
high blood pressure, heart disease, high cholesterol, or
in general do not take good care of yourself, I'm not
the guy for you. I take pride in my health and appearance,
and expect my partner to do the same.
I'm waiting to fall for you, Lady!
Give me a call!

My Spidey Senses Are Tingling...

Phil
I'm looking for that special sidekick.
The right woman for me will be
socially conservative, community-service minded,
and preferably, an entomologist.
I prefer redheads, but am not a sizist.
Some nights, I will be out
ridding our city of crime, but you are welcome
to assist, because, let's face it, females of the
species are frequently stronger and tougher.
(ie. Black Widows)
If you are up to the task, I look forward to cuddling you in my web,
and giving you upside down kisses (with or without mask).
All replies will be answered.



Thursday, December 11, 2008

Some Like It Wet...

Danny

Single Wet Male Seeks Single Wet Female.
Do you love the feeling of dampness against your skin?
Do you feel most comfortable when moist?
I'm seeking a partner for clothed, aquatic adventures...
Snorkeling in our skivvies,
Hot Tubbing in Haute Couture...
You don't have to take your clothes off
to have a good time...
Call me. (wink)

We Can Share Everything, Even Underwear

Steve!






Hello out there! Hi? Hello? Check, check! Is this thing on? Oh, ok, there we go! Hello, Ladies! Don't let my looks fool you. I am a professional (well, sort of) actor who would love to bring you into my world. You can be front row as I star in such off-Broadway hits as my writing/starring debut in "FAB-a-ret"(a really meaningful and in-depth look at the world of drag in Nazi Germany...shown here). We can play "papparazzi" while you chase me around your place or mine trying to get my picture. (Don't worry, I'll let you catch me, CLICK!)Best of all, being with me (because I'm an actor) is like getting to be with several different men. My
versatility and range will AMAZE you. You'll never be bored again, Babe.
So what are you waiting for? Call now.
PS Fellow artistes favored. No desperate screenwriters. My talent is not a whore.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Dial FFF for Full Figure Fox

Fanny
Flirtatious, feisty, fabulous, friendly...
If you feel like finding a fresh female, but fear failure,
forget it! Fanny's here!
I'm a forthright fox who feels fantastic on a
faux fur in front of the fire.
We can play footsie, go folkdancing,
or we can frolic in fondue in flagrante...
Let's flaunt our flights of fancy!
No Fetishists or Freeloaders.